normal person v. most pathetic person ever
how many months does it take a normal person to get over a break up?
i have been broken up with my ex-girlfriend (we'll call her exy) for 4 months now. 4 months almost exactly. and i was the one who broke up with her. 4 months ago. so i'm expecting that normal people, 4 months after voluntarily ending a relationship, can do things like sleep through the night and sit through an entire day at work without crying.
not i. my melodramatic breakup woes seem to only be getting worse. and now, 4 months later, all of a sudden, i can't sleep. insomnia is a pretty normal response to stress for normal people, i hear, but i can sleep like it's my super power. like, that period of time when you're in bed but before you've drifted off, when most people are thinking or daydreaming or tossing and turning, i'm already asleep. i don't have that period of time. i am out like a light, like a log, every night. and now, 4 months after breaking up with exy, aka. ruining my life, i can't get to sleep.
not only can't i sleep, but i also dream of exy and all of the other women she is with. now dreaming about an ex is normal, i know, and the other women thing is generic worst-case-scenario-torture-yourself-fantasy type shit. but not in this case. exy started date another woman (we'll call her cunty, okay?) over a month ago. according to mutual friends, who cringe at the sight of me for fear of the inevitable "so is exy happy with cunty? who is this cunty bitch? are they in love? could you please stab me with this sharp object?" exy questions, exy and cunty are quite the blissful couple.
so if the trend follows, in another few months i will stop eating and maybe stop bathing.
joolie
i have been broken up with my ex-girlfriend (we'll call her exy) for 4 months now. 4 months almost exactly. and i was the one who broke up with her. 4 months ago. so i'm expecting that normal people, 4 months after voluntarily ending a relationship, can do things like sleep through the night and sit through an entire day at work without crying.
not i. my melodramatic breakup woes seem to only be getting worse. and now, 4 months later, all of a sudden, i can't sleep. insomnia is a pretty normal response to stress for normal people, i hear, but i can sleep like it's my super power. like, that period of time when you're in bed but before you've drifted off, when most people are thinking or daydreaming or tossing and turning, i'm already asleep. i don't have that period of time. i am out like a light, like a log, every night. and now, 4 months after breaking up with exy, aka. ruining my life, i can't get to sleep.
not only can't i sleep, but i also dream of exy and all of the other women she is with. now dreaming about an ex is normal, i know, and the other women thing is generic worst-case-scenario-torture-yourself-fantasy type shit. but not in this case. exy started date another woman (we'll call her cunty, okay?) over a month ago. according to mutual friends, who cringe at the sight of me for fear of the inevitable "so is exy happy with cunty? who is this cunty bitch? are they in love? could you please stab me with this sharp object?" exy questions, exy and cunty are quite the blissful couple.
so if the trend follows, in another few months i will stop eating and maybe stop bathing.
joolie
posted by .i'll never tell. at 3:00 PM
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